Pendargon Magazine

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Dear God, a new Jeffrey

Yes, a more powerful, a more decisive Jeffrey. There are even rumors that this Jeffrey might be the most powerful Jeffrey since Jeffrey Jeffrey himself, the greatest Jeffrey. It is even said that this new Jeffrey goes by the sinister moniker, the most evil of all monikers that have ever existed since the beginning of the universe. He goes by ‘Jeffrey JeffreyJeffrey’.

The world may tremble before Jeffrey JeffreyJeffrey, who has now attained what was thought to be impossible – to have three Jeffreys in his name. God help us. God help us all if he is somehow able to conquer the fourth Jeffrey and claim all four Jeffrey names. There are rumors coming from the top that we will have to activate the secret weapon, the most dangerous weapon used only once in ancient times, by George Washington himself. We will have to activate The Johnny.

Dear God, I know, sending in The Johnny - you are saying that I am nothing but a madman’s lullaby. The last time The Johnny was sent out we lost the fourteenth colony Blevouri, the greatest colony the British ever founded. But this might be the only chance we’ll have to stop Jeffrey JeffreyJeffrey, that fiendish rogue, that dangerous individual who only craves the blood of the innocent and the Jeffreys. Some may call me a madman, but I decree that we must unleash The Johnny, the only hope that mankind and Jeffreykind have left.