Mysterio, aka the fictional make-up man from the not real Spider man, has now decided that he no longer want to be like a lame non sexy dude. He just wants to get to the top of the damn sexy mountain and be like Jake Gyllenhaal who is super sexy but also seems like a chill nice guy, which makes him, you know, even more sexy.

I guess some people get to have everything. I for weeks tried to mail him a collection of screenplays titled  Warren g Harding Big Blockersuster. I get nothing. First Denmark treats me like chump, now you, Jake. I was the president of the United States. Mysterio is not even real. That's what hurts the most you know, Jake, that no seems to care about me.