How is it this cold in Houston?

How is it cold in Houston? This seems pathologically just unfair. It's cold in Houston. Why is it cold in Houston? How is it possible? It's so cold that I can barely leave my apartment and almost nothing is open. It's like we're in bizarro land here. Who angered a witch and or a mystical traveler of some sort? Was it Sylvester Turner, the mayor of Houston? Did he anger Anemoi, the God of the Northern Wind?

I don't know. You know, that's the thing about politics here in Texas; they often don't talk about their current standing with the Pantheon. It's a thing that many people, I assume, complain about often and frequently. So you need to put a better answer out, Sylvester Turner. What have you done to anger Anemoi, the God of the Northern Wind? I demand answers. Answers most high.